Vastly improved since this morning! :-)

I couldn't understand why, when I had to go out for an appointment (more on that later) I started feeling BETTER than when I was sitting here in the cosiest room in the house. Then I got back home and saw the bottle of tablets which triggered my memory- I took a CoQ-10. I am now in love with this little pill and am going to source it out in bulk. See, I haven't taken it EVERY day (I read that it can cause insomnia so on days when I've gotten up late- [read: most days this week] I decided not to bother taking it) but today I felt SO bad I thought I'd give it a try, and so took one at around 12pm. By 2.30pm I was feeling much better. I'm still really tired and a bit woozy but nothing like as bad as this morning.

Now all I need to do is get my bladder back to manageable and I'll be... managing. I'm trying this new tablet for it after being advised to see if stopping trospium would help with the tachycardia at all, but so far I'd rather be on the trospium as the new pill ISN'T working and having an overactive bladder is the most frustating and annoying and god, even DEPRESSING thing. I'll go to the toilet, empty my bladder and 10 minutes later I need to go again, 15 minutes after that, once again, ad infinitum.

I'm going to double up the dose tonight (safe to do as they come in 15mg tablets and I'm taking 7.5 at the moment) and see if that helps and if not... I'm sticking with trospium, even if it can worsen tachycardia. Because like the cardiologist said (not that I am listening to him as he was crap but this was the one sensible, supportive thing he said) it's a case of weighing up the pros and cons and deciding what I can live with. I'm okay with tachycardia, heck, until I measured my heart rate I wasn't even aware I HAD it. (I mean, I'd notice my heart thumping when I climbed a hill or when I was stressed about something but I didn't realise it was abnormally fast). I am NOT okay with needing the toilet 2-4 times per hour.

However, I plan to be off the medication for my tilt test so it's as 'true' a test as can be. So I'm dreading the weeks leading up to it, because managing an unmedicated overactive bladder is VERY trying. :/

Now, back to that aforementioned appointment. It was a refreshing change to be in a waiting room surrounded by PEOPLE MY OWN AGE, or YOUNGER. I am so used to being around (much) older people (urology and cardiology) for appointments. It was also highly entertaining, as I was in the family planning clinic and there were a group of very vocal teenage girls all talking about who's done what with who and how so-and-so is a complete slapper etc etc.

My appointment went well and gave me hope as a couple of problems I've been having look like being just temporary hormonal adjustments to my new contraceptive and once that's settled down, all should be well. Relief. I wish all my appointments were as entertaining and uplifting- for once I walked out of a hospital type setting feeling good and happy. I stopped by the chemist on the way out and bought myself some Nytol (which contains the same active ingredient as Benadryl in the U.S). I now feel much more relaxed about getting some sleep on a Saturday night and feel, with the help of the Nytol and the CoQ10, I should be able to make it to these upcoming social events- and be in a better mood during the week too, instead of being so wiped out and cranky.

I'm now going to look up some gluten free cookbooks because I tried re-introducing wheat into my diet yesterday in the form of pancakes and my tummy has NOT been very happy with me about that today. What can I say, I'm a pleasure seeking hedonist with masochistic tendencies.

I don't know how I managed to eat wheat products every day, for so long, without realising my tummy had 'issues' with them. Nothing was diagnosed by a Dr, I had this wacky alternative health test done (I cannot right now remember its name) where I had to hold these mental rods that sent the chemical vibration of a vast array of foods and substances through me and depending on how my body reacted, the results would show what systems of my body were struggling to function correctly. My top food intolerance came out as being wheat flour so I cut it out of my diet (thinking temporarily) and any time I tried to re-introduce it, I'd get awful stomach cramps and IBS type symptoms. I am okay if I eat it in small quantities, such as in soups (wheat flour is added to so many things!) but if I eat anything like bread, pizza or pasta, tummy is not happy.

BRAIN FOG EVENT OF THE DAY

Oh dear. My Mum came in to the room to tell me I've booked 2 tickets TO Newcastle, but only ONE coming BACK. I wasn't 'with it' that day and had asked her to stay in the room with me through the process, but she'd gone out to do some hoovering, thinking I'd be capable of making the second booking myself. Obviously, I was not and was correct in thinking I needed 'babysitting' for this task.

It's incredibly frustrating and quite scary, the magnitude of how dozy I can be... it frightens me because I don't know how I am ever going to cope at being independent. The brain fog makes it so easy to cock up even the simplest of things... :/