I haven't been able to post to this blog for weeks, due to strange things that are happening with my browser- when I've tried to connect to it with firefox, it just says at the bottom 'waiting for google analytics.com' and never does anything beyond that, the swirly thing just goes around and around! I've managed to post this using google chrome, but I have just discovered things are still not quite right as I wanted to edit this part to explain how I've posted this, and the only way I could get this to appear is by pressing 'refresh' and then very quickly pressing 'stop' before this box disappears, as it was only appearing for a split second when I refreshed and then turning into a white screen... bizarre! Also not sure if I can respond to comments so don't think I'm being ignorant or ignoring if you do post one and I don't respond! It's acting weird and I dunno why.
Anyways.
I have been SO busy and am going to be even busier still!!! So many social events coming up I am having palpitations and sleepless nights just from looking at my diary! It's all fun stuff and stuff I am excited about but also apprehensive due to the lack of energy and decreased stamina of having pots. It's like every Friday night for the whole of September apart from one is a night out, and that one that I'm not out I am on the Saturday. Next weekend I am out both Friday night and all day Saturday, thanks to my bfs friends both having their wedding the same darn weekend! I've been a little worried about that for months, because I have to drive on the Saturday after the night out for the Friday do... and I hate driving when tired and potsy, so it's been a background stress for months and now almost here... I will probably feel much better when it's over with, although I should also enjoy the event.
I am equal parts happy about all these fun things to do and also stressed, in an 'argh I hope it doesn't cause me a pots flare' way. But I don't want to live my life in fear always proverbially looking over my shoulder or guarding against having a flare. I do know I've got to pace myself and things and I do what I can to ensure that happens, e.g. leaving things earlier than others, scheduling in 'rest days' in the week, conserving my energy for the weekends as much as possible. What I don't want to do is turn things down because I'm afraid I can't do it... I have to try and if my body starts to give me signs I'm to slow down or even stop, then I will. I can always cancel something but right now, my philosophy is I am going to say YES to these events and go for it, not be half hearted and think 'uhhh I don't know if I should...' IF my body starts to tell me it's not up for it THEN I'll say no, but as long as I'm coping, even if it means being more tired in the week, then I'm bloody well going to have some fun!
So, if I don't blog for a while, it's because I am both resting and conserving my energy for all these fun events over this month... should be back in October with an update if not before.
As for the job/career dilemmas have finally decided- going to work part time in a nursery and the rest of the time doing my therapies. Just need to find that part time nursery job now...
Things with bf brilliant. He is fully supportive and loving with me despite my emotional and physical ups and downs (have had a few teary moments with him last month due to stress and uncertainty about what to do career wise- the stress aspect being the fear of how it will affect my health) and he has included me in all the decisions about how to decorate the new place, which should all be finished in time for my birthday, so I can't wait. It will look fantastic and we adore the place and the area. So all in all, life is looking very rosy and I am tired as usual BUT feeling happy and optimistic for the future.
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Aww that's awesome! I'm glad you two are do great and he's being there for you, and of course including you in the decorating since you will be living there too before long!
ReplyDeleteI think the career choice is a good one. You get to keep doing your therapy, and also get to do something else you love.
I feel the same way about planning, but WOW you are busy for a POTSie! I'm glad you're doing well and keeping positive about wanting to get out and do as much as you can, but happy to hear you'll cancel if it does become too much.
It's great to see you doing so much better hun! You deserve it and more! *hugs*
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